Here is Phil in his new garage home! Yesterday we added a heater, and may have to get a 2nd one, depending on how cold the weather gets.

Micah and his girlfriend Missy have been here for a couple of days. It was great to have Micah take care of his Dad part of the day so I could get out. Phil continues to be happy, and never shows any frustration at his limitations. He's again taken over asking the blessing at our meals. The gist of it is "thank you, thank you, thank you. And we do have much, much to be thankful for.

This has been an interesting weekend. During the past week Phil has "remembered" that he smokes. And that he really likes to smoke. And often. So....I was limiting the smoking because we had to go outside and it was difficult sometimes. Friday morning he woke up at 4:00 AM declaring that he needed to get out to his office, he had some work to do. His office is his garage. And those of you have been here know how clean and neat he always kept that place. I'd been trying to get it cleaned out enough to get the car in when cold weather arrives, but still had a long way to go. But Friday morning he moved out there and he wouldn't come back in. When I tried to push his chair up the ramp, he'd grab the hand rail with that strong left hand, and there was no moving him. So, we have now moved into the garage.

Our Stephen spent the day with me yesterday cleaning and sorting through boxes and "stuff", some of it quite interesting. And Phil was talking well enough yesterday to help us determine what some of it was. Then I hosed the garage out, put down a rug, moved in a chair and lamps and Stephen extended a TV cable out through the door, and Phil said it was the happiest day in his whole life. If I'd only known, I'd have done it long ago.

It's really worked out quite well, there's more open room for Phil to wheel around and he smokes and rearranges things and is quite happy! I've not mentioned before that after his surgery he was OCD (obsessive compulsive). Everything has to be picked up, straight, in it's place, and rearranged over and over again. So the garage keeps him busy. Our computer is near the garage door, so I can hear him, and I also have a monitor out there so I can hear him if I'm in the house. Since his wheelchair is NEVER still, the subtle screech of his wheels lets me know he's moving and OK.

We went to church today! Went to Goshen where friends have family have lovingly cared for us since this ordeal began. Phil and I both enjoyed being in church again, and plan to keep going as we can.

I'm turning Phil's phone on and he'll have it near if any of "his boys" want to call. The voice mail is full and I don't know the code, so don't leave a message, if you don't get him, try again. He won't be very understandable, but "my boys" and "I love you" will be easy to understand. He's missing you guys.

Yesterday was a fantastic day. Phil's speech was so much better, we were able to actually have some conversation time, which is what I've longed for. We spent a lot of time outside, and it was just a super day.Today is back as before, speech and comprehension not as good. But I'm happy for one day, and perhaps there will be others. He did sings two lines of "Happy Birthday" on the telephone to Phillip. That was a pleasant surprise for Phillip and me.

We now have a ramp on the front porch, and tomorrow we'll have our coffee out there even if it is 40 degrees! Out contractor, Cliff, was here to finish up some work in the living room and dining room where we've removed walls to make everything open; Phil and I had planned to have ceiling fans put on the porch, but I told Cliff to forget the fans and just build us a ramp. And he did.

Phil now travels about 20 miles an hour in his wheelchair using one arm and one leg. He's happiest in the garage where he can smoke and move without running into furniture (though I rearranged furniture again today to make more room for him). I catch him sitting at the garage door - at the top of the ramp - and those who have known him a long time probably agree that one day he's going to take the plunge down that big ramp by himself and crash at the bottom. I've threatened him with a sure trip to the hospital again if he does that, but I'm thinking of a way to make that door 'Phil-proof'.

Phil's friend Walt was here today, and I got a nap! Thanks, Walt.

A special note to Brad and Nickie - Phil carried your phone numbers with him until he went to bed, they're laying on his bedside table where put them when he laid down.

Phil has continued to be more alert and talkative each day (though most of what he says is garbled words). He's moving around in his wheel chair constantly, opening drawers, getting into the refrigerator, spilling things in the pantry...... Stronger and inquisitive, and also much brighter. You who saw him a couple of weeks ago when we thought we were losing him will be quite surprised to see him now. I feel the radiation caused severe problems for him, and he's recovering from that. He's eating well, eats everything I put on his plate plus dessert, and his pain medication is keeping him pain free this week.

Brother Roy visited today and took Phil out on the deck. I was able to get outside and get some work done which was a great break for me. Who knows what tomorrow will bring? I'm thankful for a good day today.

Phil has improved a little each day this week, and we are so thrilled! The boys were able to get him out on the porch in his wheelchair, so we got to sit outside quite a bit, which was really nice. He's talking more, but still doesn't comprehend very well. We just love him and try to keep him happy.

Phillip, Melissa, and Ella are on their way to DC to look for a place to live. Pray with us that they will find a place quickly and get settled in. Melissa needs to be making her nest! Little Josie is due the 1st of December, and may be here sooner if she comes early as Ella did. It's a relief to have them back in the states.

The food sent this week was great, thanks to everyone.

We're certainly having a better week than last week. We've decided the radiation treatments caused swelling in Phil's brain which caused him to be much weaker and less responsive. This week has been better, he's even saying a few words. He's enjoying the boys and can even cut up with them a little occasionally. Those moments are a treasure. We have enough food in the refrigerator to last the week, maybe longer, so no more food is needed for awhile. It's really been appreciated and enjoyed. We're just taking one day at a time.

Here are "The Boys"! All three of them. Phil has been so happy to have them here today he doesn't want to sleep. We expect him to be really tired tomorrow. Blessings from friends continue to flow in and we thank you.

A good day today, Phillip and Micah are both here! Phil was happy to see them, and kept looking at Phillip as though he couldn't believe it was really him. Lots of blessings from friends and our children this weekend. Food brought in, a plumbing problem fixed, house cleaned and laundry done. The boys are here to help take care of their Dad, and my girls are taking care of me. We are so blessed. Dear Lord, please bless our children and friends.......

Phil has slept a lot today, a little weaker it seems. We now have Hospice coming. Phillip is in the air headed back to the US! It will be so good to have him home.

I'm posting a picture of happier days, Phil with his brother Roy, and cousins Miles and Linda. Roy gets credit for the glasses provided to cover one eye instead of wearing a patch. Phil wore the glasses for days (but we removed the extra parts). They WERE more comfortable than the patch he was wearing. Leave it to brother Roy!

A little weaker today, but has eaten fairly well and able to swallow all those pills! Only 2 more days until Phillip and Micah will both be here!

Yesterday was a better day. Phil was up some, ate a little at all three meals, and was able to take all of his medicine. He's still sleeping this morning, so I'll add an update later. Christy and her children spent the night with me last night, our son Stephen stayed the night before. I don't know what we would do without our wonderful children. Everytime Phil would ask the blessing at meals, he would ALWAYS pray, God bless our kids. Now that I'm doing the praying, I pray the same prayer he always did.

I would like to ask, if anyone is able and would like to do something during this time, that maybe evening meals could be prepared and taken to Mom. I know Micah will be coming, also Phillip, Melissa, and Ella will be around this weekend and Mom has got her hands full just trying to care for Phil. Last night at 8pm she said, "I don't think I ate lunch today." She'll need energy for these upcoming days, and skipping meals is too easy when your caring for another. Just give her a heads up before you arrive, or feel free to call me to set up a meal. 967-0790, or 307-9464. Thank you all for caring and remembering Mom and Phil and the family during this time. It's such a blessing to have friends.
Christy

What a difference a day can make. Yesterday we were doing well, even went out and got Phil's hair cut. Today when he hadn't awakened by noon, I started trying to get him up and found he was unable. A trip to ER per ambulance produced the verdict that the tumor is larger and putting more pressure on his brain. He wakes up occasionally and recognizes us, then goes back to sleep. He was able to give me his "evil eye" look when he woke up in the ER and realized where he was. He's now back in his own bed sleeping and snoring peacefully.



None of this has gone as we had planned. We were supposed to have surgery, then several good months with chemo and radiation. Then infection upset that plan, leaving Phil in a wheel chair unable to express his thoughts and feelings. We had hope that the chemo and radiation was going to bring some of those deficits back, but I feel as though the world stopped today.

When the time is appropriate, please send donations to:

The Minnie Pearl Cancer Foundation
2410 Patterson Street
Suite 110
Nashville, TN 37203

"The light from heaven is about to break upon us...

to give light to those who sit in darkness,

and to guide US to the path of peace.:

I've been trying to get a picture of Phil with one of his cats. This is his favorite, Simba. He doesn't have much patience with the cats jumping on him these days, so I was glad when he let Simba lay in his lap and Phil stroked him for a little while.

No new changes, just waiting for better days and counting down the days until Phillip gets here (6 more days).

Radiation treatment #2 down! We had to be in Murfreesboro at 8:30 this morning, quite a challenge, but we made it - and Dr. Lee was just walking up in his shorts and tee shirt and helped us get out of the car! I told him it wasn't his job to help us get out of the car, and he just laughed.
He's edging up there with Dr. Gammada with me; for those who haven't heard the story, Dr. Gammada cooked and brought Phil breakfast one morning while we were in Rehab. The eggs were from his own chickens. He brought enough for me too, and it was really good. But the love
in it was the best part. Phil just has that kind of effect on people, as one man said at his military retirement cook out, "He can be yelling at you for something you've done, and you just love him anyway."

The radiation tech was the only one there today after Dr. Lee left, so I got to "assist", which made me happy since I'm so curious about everything medical. She told me they had a man very similar to Phil at one time, couldn't walk and couldn't talk, and they saw him get gradually better every day. When his treatment were finished, he was walking and talking! She said they had all been talking about how Phil reminded them of this man, and she gave me new hope that the radiation will make a great difference. We'll keep praying and praying.

If you call and I don't answer the phone, don't be offended, I'm just very busy helping Phil with every move he makes, and that is my priority right now. We created this blog for that reason.
Also if you want to contact me personally, my e-mail address is chockley116@yahoo.com

One radiation treatment completed!

The past two days have been a bit discouraging, Phil's comprehension seems to have decreased, and headaches have increased. We went to Murfreesboro yesterday for the radiation treatment,
and he was unable to tolerate being strapped down with a tight mask over his face to hold his head from any movement. Today we will try again with medication to sedate him first. I'm not sure the limited benefits of the radiation are worth putting Phil through this; pray for us that we'll make decisions based on what is right for this man we love so much, rather than what we want for ourselves.